shohag686|| 
memberPRO

04/10/2017 09:24:39
(172 weeks ago)
Ratio: 3.16
Posts: 342
  

18. Ahead of the Competition

My neighbor is in the Guinness World Records. He has had 44 concussions. He lives very close to me. 
A stone’s throw away, in fact.

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shohag686|| 
memberPRO

04/10/2017 09:27:51
(172 weeks ago)
Ratio: 3.16
Posts: 342
  

19.  Warning Labels We can Really Use:-

Google: “Warning! You may find more than what you’re looking for.”

Apple computers: “Warning! High Smug Advisory.”

Wikipedia: “Warning label does 
not exist. Would you like to create warning label?”

Match.com: “Contents may just be settling.”

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shohag686|| 
memberPRO

05/10/2017 08:25:42
(172 weeks ago)
Ratio: 3.16
Posts: 342
  

20. Fishing

Teacher: Why can’t freshwater fish live in salt water?

Student: The salt would give them high blood pressure.

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shohag686|| 
memberPRO

05/10/2017 08:27:24
(172 weeks ago)
Ratio: 3.16
Posts: 342
  

21. Common Thread

A middle school in New Ipswich, New Hampshire, encourages freethinking. A sign outside the school reads, “You are unique—just like everyone else.”

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shohag686|| 
memberPRO

05/10/2017 08:28:21
(172 weeks ago)
Ratio: 3.16
Posts: 342
  

22. Apology Accepted

Teacher: George Washington not only chopped down his father’s cherry tree but also admitted it. Now, Joey, do you know why his father didn’t punish him?

Joey: Because George still had the ax in his hand?

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shohag686|| 
memberPRO

05/10/2017 08:31:32
(172 weeks ago)
Ratio: 3.16
Posts: 342
  

23.  Personal Question

During our computer class, the teacher chastised one boy for talking to the girl sitting next to him.

"I was just asking her a question," the boy said.

"If you have a question, ask me," the teacher tersely replied.

"Okay," he answered. "Do you want to go out with me Friday night?"

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shohag686|| 
memberPRO

05/10/2017 08:46:53
(172 weeks ago)
Ratio: 3.16
Posts: 342
  

24.  Mom and Son

Mother: Anton, do you think I’m a bad mother?

Son: My name is Paul.

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shohag686|| 
memberPRO

05/10/2017 08:52:49
(172 weeks ago)
Ratio: 3.16
Posts: 342
  

25.  Mosquitos

Sleep with an open window tonight!

1400 mosquitos like that. 420 mosquitos commented on it. 210 mosquitos shared this.

One mosquito invited for the event. 2800 mosquitos will be attending the event.

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shohag686|| 
memberPRO

05/10/2017 08:55:25
(172 weeks ago)
Ratio: 3.16
Posts: 342
  

26.  Drinking Problem


“My wife suffers from a drinking problem.”
-
“Oh is she an alcoholic?”
-
“No, I am, but she’s the one who suffers.”

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shohag686|| 
memberPRO

05/10/2017 08:57:39
(172 weeks ago)
Ratio: 3.16
Posts: 342
  

27.  Army

I managed to lose my rifle when I was in the army. I had to pay $855 to cover the loss.

I’m starting to understand why a Navy captain always goes down with his ship.

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